Tuesday, June 02, 2009


Mike and I went to the Mark of the Beast, 666 talk, while Rob nobly watched the kids play WOW and Fallout3.
I tried, what can I say...

Guest blog by my dear brother in law

Never ever take Coz undercover to an evangelical revival meeting thingo. All you have to do is look down and close your eyes and nod a bit when the praying is in progress, and then mumble "amen" whenever the preacher dude does. In order not to get tumbled in the first five minutes and have the organizer sit right next to you, one must resist the urge to mock. One must also not send text messages to Alyssa during the opening prayer, and one must definitely not smirk and make walrus surfacing sounds everytime the preacher makes references to "biblical facts".

Anyways, we learnt several things:

The bible is chock full of references to beasts that have many horns, many heads, many crowns, and many nasty christian crushing habits.

The beast is currently a kraut. Hitler was not the beast by the way, but Pius the tenth was.

According to bible math, God prophesised exactly the 1260 years between the hand over of rome from Constantine to the pope, and the sacking of the vatican by Napoleon, with the insight that the beast would reign for "40 and two months". Forty and two months, being of course, exactly 1260 years...

There is also a hole in the heavens in the Orion Nebula, that is 19 trillion light years across, and through this Jesus is coming soon. Coz observed, that he certainly has porked up a tad since his stint as opening bowler for the Nazareth first eleven.

These biblical facts gave me a headache, so I dragged her out and we went home for beer and ice cream. I prophesise that Coz will not be a Seventh Day Adventist by this weekend. Which is of course, the blinking of an eye in biblical time.

Look out for fat arse Jesus plummeting through on your head through Orion, and steer clear of the Pope, lest he eat you with one of his fire breathing mouths.